Friday, June 8, 2012

Don't take it personally!

Thank you all so much for the kind words regarding my beloved Riley. I am still so sad, and it seems that feeling is becoming a common one in our family. We all go about our life, but we miss Beth, and now we miss Riley. I hope they are having a good time together in heaven. He was the best dog, and I was lucky to have him for three years.

My other little dog, Roscoe seems to be looking for him. He's not quite the same, and the spark is gone from his eyes. They were crate mates at the shelter, and we ended up taking them both. I used to say how much easier my life would be if I hadn't taken the dogs, and had not acted so impulsively. But no, I made a quick decision, and said 'I'll take them both'. They were a handful as little 4 month puppies, but grew into great dogs. Now I regret every saying that. Who would have known how much our lives would change in 3 years.

Travelling to the shore in the 'doggy hammock'.
I hope my posts don't make you all feel down. I know our common goal is the BFC and/or losing/maintaining our weight. I feel my blog has grown into more than just that, and you are my friends. I just have to let you know what's going on with me, and I so enjoy when I get to have a glimpse into your lives as well.

Regarding the weight loss, I am creeping in the right direction, but ever so slowly. I am a  carb cheater, a wine drinker, and an over indulger. I am not perfect by any means. I am so in awe of those who made the commitment, followed it through and lost their weight pretty quickly. On facebook the other day, one person commented that they had only lost 25-30 lbs since January. They were upset at the slow loss. I haven't lost that much in a year! I'm down only about 17 lbs. I don't get it right all the time, my commitment wanes and sometimes ( gulp) I eat something white.

When I read that, I immediately took it to heart, and thought, wow, I am a failure. I blew it. I could have been down much more had I planned better, written down, cut back on the carbs. But then I said to myself, I can't take this personally. I am doing things on my own time, but I'm doing them. But the difference for me this time is I have a plan to always get back to, and I know it works. Limiting sugar, and processed carbs is truely the answer for me, and it works for me if I work at it.

The <em>four agreements</em>: a practical guide to personal freedom [Book]So if you are like me, and maybe aren't setting the world on fire with whatever goal you have set for yourself.....keep going. Don't compare yourself. Do your best. Don't talk down to yourself. Don't take things personally. Don't assume what works for someone else has to work for you. In fact these statements are almost directly what the book The Four Agreements state.

This is a great little, easy to read book, that I have had for years. I have found that  any strife, turmoil, anger or sadness I encounter by way of my actions or the actions of others, could have usually been avoided had I followed these agreements. Here's a summary below.

Agreement 1

Be impeccable with your word – Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.

Agreement 2

Don’t take anything personally – Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.

Agreement 3

Don’t make assumptions – Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

Agreement 4

Always do your best – Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.

Blessing to you all. Stay the course towards health and happiness. Sending love and hugs, and thanks for your love and support.

Thought for the day: Victory is won not in miles but in inches. Win a little now, hold your ground, and later, win a little more. ~ Louis L'Amour


  1. Lovely post today, Pattie. I think you're doing great. Most people would have gained weight with all that you've gone through this year. Your not being dishonest with yourself about how you're doing, and that's important. If and when you're ready to do "better", you will.

  2. One of my favorite books EVER! Such simple agreements make such a HUGE impact on your life if you let it - xoxo

  3. I agree with Daisy - you ARE doing great! To go through what you have this year and keep on plugging away is a super accomplishment! That, at the end of the day, is what we all want! take care.

  4. I just want to say that I love this blog, I feel honored to share your thoughts, and I love those Agreements!
    You will get to where you want to be, slow and steady wins the long term race! And you don't hate the BFC, that's half the battle!

  5. Pattie, I've always loved your blog and your honesty. I think weight loss is just slower at our age, and life still happens in the midst of it all. Try carrying around 17 pound weights all day and you will see how much you have really accomplished!

  6. Pattie - Thank you for sharing such a personal part of your life with us. That's what I love about reading your blog - you allow us to share in the details of your life. We all bring something a little different to the blogging table, different perspectives, different ways of sharing. I love your sweet, caring nature and I appreciate that you keep it honest and real! (I always love when I see that you have posted).

    Losing a pet is so super painful and my heart goes out to you. Lots of HUGS being sent your way.

  7. Hi Pattie, Blogging is whatever we want it to be. I say - say what ever you want. That's how I always am.
    I can't even say enough how sorry I am, having done that twice already myself. (Big Hug)
    We all are different and I used to think I was failing during my first year too on the BFC comparing myself to others. But now I do know that we all go at a different pace. You are NEVER a failure - Big Love smack here!
    Have a great day :-)

  8. I'm so sorry about your Riley! I must've missed your post and tried to read it today, but just can't. We lost our beloved guinea pig, Edward, today and it hurts too much to read your post. Our Edward was loved just like we have loved our dogs. Sometimes I swear she (yes, Edward was a she ;) was human. Atleast Riley and Edward died knowing they were loved unconditionally and they led very happy lives with our families! On a different note, don't ever feel like a failure with only losing 17 lbs. Would your rather have those 17 lbs on you again? Of course not and you worked for those 17 lbs so you should feel proud. I did cut down on the wine this week (1 glass a night only) after reading Maria Emmerichs (of Maria's Nutritious and Delicious blog) book on metabolism. Alcohol acts like extra estrogen (which causes roundness and bulging) and slows our metabolism. Trying to get into shape for Maui ;)

    Hugs to you!

  9. So very sorry you had to put down your sweet Riley. I have a fur baby, too, and can't imagine your sadness and loss :( Thinking of you!!!